Why the 5 Love Languages Matter

You may have heard a little bit about the five love languages. After many decades of studying couples, Dr. Gary Chapman identified five unique ways different people give and receive love. The five love languages are words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, gift-giving, and acts of service. Everyone expresses love in their own way, and it’s important to know how not only your romantic partner expresses their love for you, but also how your friends and family express love.

For example, you may find that when someone does chores or runs errands for you, you feel the most loved. But, they may not see those actions as a primary source of feeling affection and rather they find physical touch or quality time more meaningful. Knowing how to speak the languages of those you care about ensures that they feel valued and appreciated. If you’re speaking different love languages, intentions can sometimes be misinterpreted and you may feel misunderstood or feel like you’re not a priority.

Once you speak the same language, there is less miscommunication, more contentment, and much deeper connections. Not only are the love languages between partners often underemphasized, we also don’t think to look at love languages among our friends and family. It is completely normal for your love language toward your partner to differ from the love language you prefer to give and receive with your father. Once we identify how to speak the language of those who are close to us, we open up so many more doors to deeper and lasting connections.

Not sure about your personal love language? Take the quiz and encourage your partner, friends, and family to do so as well to see how you relate!